My communication with my Guru started early. I was born at Kutbal a village about 29 miles from Rawalpindi in the Punjab province in undivided India. In that area there were many mixed families of Kesadharis and Sehjdharis. I was one whose hair had been cut. I do not distinctly remember what happened but when I was about five years old I asked my hair to be restored. I wanted to be Kesadhari and Ram Lal became Rawel Singh.

Shortly afterwards my grandfather died and on my request my parents who moved to another town left me with my grandmother. She was a highly religious lady living according to Sikh tenets and doing Nitnem regularly. She had the desired influence on me. When I was about eight years old I was formally introduced to reading Sri Guru Granth Sahib. This was called Charni Lagna literally meaning being at the feet of the Guru. I went back to my parents in Arifwala in Montgomery District after primary school for educational reasons. There I joined the Khalsa Bhujangi Sabha, an association of young Sikh children who under the guidance of elders used to present programs on Sikh History and religion on Gurpurabs and other occasions. This was a God-sent opportunity to get seriously involved in Sikh activities.

Our parents were meaningfully loving, giving what we needed and also ensuring we became good, successful human beings. They regularly recited the Japji Sahib in the morning.

India was divided into two parts on 15th August 1947. We stayed put at Arifwala, now in Pakistan, until we had to leave, at a few minutes notice, 11 days later, on foot. There was no time to gather belongings. We just left and walked for the next six days halting for nights. My father had only 300 rupees with him so when we reached re-demarcated India he left us near our relatives so that he could work to enable the family to live. I passed high school in 1949 and realizing that I was the eldest son started working to help the family. My father would have none of that. He told me that it was his responsibility to educate his children and for that he would live on channa (grams) if normal food could not be afforded. The grit that both our parents showed during the period was remarkable. This taught us how to face hardship and nothing has seemed hard since.

In 1950 when I was in the college hostel my father went on his first trip by sea. I was anxious about his safety. One night I woke up at 2 AM and went to the hostel gate. I found a telegram being delivered. I said it must be for me. It was from my father informing me of his safe arrival. It convinced me that when one thinks of a loved one sincerely communication gets established. I later connected my experience with the Tenth Guru’s teaching in the spiritual field:
ਸਾਚ ਕਹਉ ਸੁਨ ਲੇਹੁ ਸਬੈ ਜਿਨ ਪ੍ਰੇਮ ਕੀਉ ਤਿਨ ਹੀ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਪਾਇਓ ॥ ॥੯ ॥
Let all hear this truth ‘only through love can the Creator be reached’ (9th Swaiyya).

I was commissioned as an officer in the Indian army in June 1954. In the army there are regular programs for development and I did reasonably well in them. However on one such course in 1963, I found myself not doing well. This caused a lot of tension and I had to seek medical intervention. I was diagnosed ‘anxiety state’ and given tranquilizers. When coming back from the doctor I said to myself “You are the Guru’s Sikh; you do not need tranquilizers”. I put the medicine away and have not needed it since. I do not know what will happen in the future but as of now at the age approaching 76 years I am not on any regular medication. Being a Sikh I believe:
ਸਰਬ ਰੋਗ ਕਾ ਅਉਖਦੁ ਨਾਮੁ ॥ ਕਲਿਆਣ ਰੂਪ ਮੰਗਲ ਗੁਣ ਗਾਮ ॥ ੫ ੨੭੪
Naam is the treatment for all ailments; by singing Divine praises one is freed from afflictions and gets happiness (M: 5, SGGS, p 274).

I have found the Naam medicine to be amazingly effective. Because of past indiscretion in food and pain killers, my stomach bothers me at times mostly with acidity. One day in 1985 CE it was really bothersome. It was time for Rehras Sahib and I was motivated to use the Baani as medicine. The method adopted was to break the rhythm, utter every syllable distinctly and let it cause a vibration starting from the vocal chords and going down to the lower stomach thus involving the whole body. By the end of Ardas, acidity had almost completely disappeared. I tried the same method later for a loose stomach and it worked. This takes time but is so fruitful. It also helps in good sleep.

As a Lieutenant Colonel I was given the job of raising a large new army regiment in 1972. All new units have personnel drawn from different units who may not have worked with one another. There are therefore apprehension of lack of cohesiveness and uncertainty about the style of the new Commanding Officer. My experience had shown that in order to soothe the nerves nothing works better than to be able to worship according to one’s faith. All faiths must be respected. The third Guru prays:
ਜਗਤੁ ਜਲੰਦਾ ਰਖਿ ਲੈ ਆਪਣੀ ਕਿਰਪਾ ਧਾਰਿ ॥ ਜਿਤੁ ਦੁਆਰੈ ਉਬਰੈ ਤਿਤੈ ਲੈਹੁ ਉਬਾਰਿ ॥ ੩ ੮੫੩
The world is afire O Lord; save the people whatever it takes (M: 3, SGGS, p 853).

So arrangements were made for establishing a Hindu temple, a Christian chapel and a Sikh Gurdwara in the unit. This had a salutary effect in two ways. Firstly there were no serious cases of indiscipline because the men remained occupied in their spare time. Secondly because of lack of any distractions and friction, they applied themselves to training and the unit was declared ‘fit for war’ in the very first annual inspection.

In life there are stages when one desires children, position, money and good health. Gurbani says:
ਆਪੇ ਜਾਣੈ ਆਪੇ ਦੇਇ ॥ ਆਖਹਿ ਸਿ ਭਿ ਕੇਈ ਕੇਇ ॥ ੧ ੫
The Creator knows what is needed and gives; but those who acknowledge this are rare (Jap Ji, SGGS, p 5).

In spite of this teaching we get impatient, ask and are given. After our marriage my wife conceived once but it ended in miscarriage. After that she did not conceive for quite some time. There were suggestions for medical consultation but considering that she had conceived once we felt it was not necessary. After some time we offered Ardas and were blessed.

In service there is a system of selection for further promotion beyond the rank of major in the Army. One gets anxious when the selection board sits. I do not remember if I prayed for being approved but was certainly anxious. This anxiety vanished when I became conscious during recitation of Rehras Sahib:
ਤੂੰ ਕਰਤਾ ਸਚਿਆਰੁ ਮੈਡਾ ਸਾਂਈ ॥ ਜੋ ਤਉ ਭਾਵੈ ਸੋਈ ਥੀਸੀ ਜੋ ਤੂੰ ਦੇਹਿ ਸੋਈ ਹਉ ਪਾਈ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥ ੪ ੧੧
You are just, my Creator and my Master; every thing happens at Your pleasure, I shall get (what I deserve and) You give (M: 4, SGGS, p 11).

The promotions kept coming until I was bypassed for promotion beyond the rank of Brigadier. I thought to myself and acknowledged that the system was fair.

It will be hypocritical to say that I have no wishes, but they somehow seem to get fulfilled on their own. I do not pray to get some thing but I do pray in Ardas for good health and Sahj, equipoise, as also before undertaking a long journey.

It has become a practice while travelling alone or with the family to recite the first five Pauris (stanzas) of, if the journey is short, and the whole of Jap Ji Sahib when it is long. The family sometimes wanted to skip it. Once when travelling from Alwar to New Delhi we stopped to refuel the car. After refilling I started the car but the steering wheel moved freely and the wheels wouldn’t turn. I got down only to find that the coupler from the steering column to the axle had disengaged because all the four bolts had fallen off. We had driven a good 300 kilometers without a mishap. This was providence at work. After doing the needful we moved again and my wife said let us recite Jap ji Sahib. There is no better way to learn than by experience.

In today’s world drinking is considered a social necessity in the West. It is generally not so in India now but when I was commissioned in 1954, the British influence was still there and I used to be almost the only one not drinking in any unit. I remained steadfast despite pressures and tried to live the Gurbani teaching of avoiding intoxicants. Friends including Generals who came to our place knew that there would be no alcohol served even in parties. It did not hurt me; instead I got plenty of respect.

In India there is considerable corruption and nothing seems to move without money. I have never been able to reconcile to this and decided that I will not be a party to the evil. I have therefore never used bribery to get things done. Whether it is getting a rail reservation at short notice, getting house plans sanctioned, getting permits for bricks or cement, electricity or water connection, getting occupancy certificate for the house or income tax assessments even for business; these have all been done by doggedly following them up despite delays but without getting frustrated. Ultimately such things have positive effect and one earns respect of others. When building our current house I had exceeded the laid down floor area and was advised to pay cash to escape high penalty. I decided to do the opposite and paid the high penalty by check. The word went round and whenever I went to the Housing Board office people there saluted me.

With the blessings and cooperation of every one around I took on the task of building a Gurdwara in our neighborhood since none existed. Some one suggested he knew the Chief Minister and could ask him to help. I advised against it on the principle of:
ਮਾਨੁਖ ਕੀ ਟੇਕ ਬ੍ਰਿਥੀ ਸਭ ਜਾਨੁ ॥ ਦੇਵਨ ਕਉ ਏਕੈ ਭਗਵਾਨੁ ॥ ੫ ੨੮੧
Support of another person is of no use; the Creator is the lone benefactor (M: 5, SGGS, p 281).
The allotment of land, the zoning plan, building plans, actual construction and completion certificate were not easy. But because of religious work and what is described above, the concerned officers were more than forthcoming.

Gurbani tells us that all relatives including the parents, spouse and children meet because of association in the previous birth:
ਮਾਤ ਪਿਤਾ ਬਨਿਤਾ ਸੁਤ ਬੰਧਪ ਇਸਟ ਮੀਤ ਅਰੁ ਭਾਈ ॥ ਪੂਰਬ ਜਨਮ ਕੇ ਮਿਲੇ ਸੰਜੋਗੀ ਅੰਤਹਿ ਕੋ ਨ ਸਹਾਈ ॥੧॥ ੫ ੭੦੦
The parents, spouse, children, relatives, dear ones, friends and siblings; they come together because of association in the past lif,e but cannot help at the end (M: 5, SGGS, p 700).

I was educated and an officer but I left the choice of my wife-to-be to my parents and coincidentally she did likewise to hers. We met each other months after our engagement. We got married in 1960 and it worked out fine. There used to be arguments but that should be expected. Religion, family values and faithfulness in marriage were strong bonding factors as have been the children. I made it a point to give full respect to my in-laws as did she.

My wife somehow contracted a rare lung disease and was hospitalized with no hope of recovery. Even in that state whenever the doctors enquired how she was, she said “I am alright”. On 27th September 2003 at about 4 AM her whole family was by her side as the doctors told us the end was near. I started the morning Nitnem at about 5 AM and at the end offered Ardas for the Nitnem and her. She was going. I kissed her good bye on the forehead; she rolled her eyes to look at every one and breathed her last at 6:05 AM.

On her death we inserted an obituary in newspapers saying “Complying with Divine command Mrs Harmohinder Anand passed away peacefully”. Apart from relatives and friends, we got a response among others from a Christian Pastor. He said he was sorry to hear of the loss and then went on to say that there is loneliness and sadness on death. He said Jesus could help the way he revived Lazarus. Thanking him I said we accepted God’s will and were in prayer, not sad. Also there is no loneliness when the Lord is the companion. I offered to discuss further but he never got back.

I have been doing Nitnem regularly. I am unable to eat breakfast and dinner until after the morning and evening Nitnem respectively. I was able to do this even during active war although there used to be delays. There are times when I am able to concentrate while on others it tends to get mechanical. My experience shows it is mostly due to the food at the previous meal or when something is on the mind. I try to overcome these but do not always succeed. In the Baanis that we recite I have found some points which help if one is attentive. A few examples:

In success I stop at:
ਸਭਿ ਗੁਣ ਤੇਰੇ ਮੈ ਨਾਹੀ ਕੋਇ ॥ ਵਿਣੁ ਗੁਣ ਕੀਤੇ ਭਗਤਿ ਨ ਹੋਇ ॥
O Lord all virtue is Yours, I have none; unless You grant me virtues I cannot engage in Bhagti, devotion (Jap Ji , SGGS, p 4).

If one can praise the Lord all treasure are received:
ਜਿਸ ਨੋ ਬਖਸੇ ਸਿਫਤਿ ਸਾਲਾਹ ॥ ਨਾਨਕ ਪਾਤਿਸਾਹੀ ਪਾਤਿਸਾਹੁ ॥੨੫॥
One who is granted the gift of Divine praise, is the king of kings (Jap Ji, SGGS, p 5).
In a state of conflict Jaap Sahib helps:
ਨਮੋ ਕਲਹ ਕਰਤਾ ॥ ਨਮੋ ਸਾਤ ਰੂਪੇ ॥ ੧੮੭ ॥
I pay obeisance to You O Lord, the creator of conflict but also the embodiment of peace (Jaap Sahib, 187).
At the end of Jaap Sahib
“ਸਦਾ ਅੰਗ ਸੰਗੇ ਅਭੰਗੰ ਬਿਭੂਤੇ” ॥ ੧੯੯ ॥
He is always by my side with unfading glory (Jaap Sahib, 199).
If said slowly one can feel the mind rejoicing being confident of Divine support.

At the end of Rehras Sahib:
ਨਾਨਕ ਨਾਮੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਤਾਂ ਜੀਵਾਂ ਤਨੁ ਮਨੁ ਥੀਵੈ ਹਰਿਆ ॥੧॥ ੫ ੧੪੨੯
When I am receptive to Naam, my body and mind bloom (M: 5, SGGS, p 1429).
One can feel the cooling effect in the whole body if this is said consciously.

These practices have been useful. The chase for comfort has been considerably lessened and feeling of discomfort reduced. My children often mock at me for sitting without a fan. Life seems to be a blessing. Quite often the hands involuntarily rise to be folded in thanksgiving. I like to take walks and many a time the feet just stop and the eyes look upwards expressing gratitude. This is how the fifth Guru describes this state:
ਕੀਮ ਨ ਸਕਾ ਪਾਇ ਸੁਖ ਮਿਤੀ ਹੂ ਬਾਹਰੇ ॥ ਨਾਨਕ ਸਾ ਵੇਲੜੀ ਪਰਵਾਣੁ ਜਿਤੁ ਮਿਲੰਦੜੋ ਮਾ ਪਿਰੀ ॥੨॥ ੫ ੭੦੯
I cannot put a value on the boundless comforts I have; that moment is worthwhile when I am with my Beloved (M: 5, SGGS, p 709).

When someone asks me about my welfare, the spontaneous reply is “there is plenty to thank God for”.

I have lived a full life and surely the time to depart is approaching. That is the law of nature. When it will be only the Creator knows. I can only say I am looking forward to it, not afraid. Kabir Ji says it is on death that the soul attains supreme bliss of merger with the Creator:
ਕਬੀਰ ਜਿਸੁ ਮਰਨੇ ਤੇ ਜਗੁ ਡਰੈ ਮੇਰੇ ਮਨਿ ਆਨੰਦੁ ॥ ਮਰਨੇ ਹੀ ਤੇ ਪਾਈਐ ਪੂਰਨੁ ਪਰਮਾਨੰਦੁ ॥੨੨॥ ਕ ੧੩੬੫
Death, of which people are afraid, is bliss for me; for, it is on death that one receives the supreme bliss (Kabir, SGGS, p 1365).

That is the hope. The decision to accept the soul for merger rests with Akal Purkh, the Eternal Master. I sincerely request:
ਦੇਹੁ ਸਜਣ ਅਸੀਸੜੀਆ ਜਿਉ ਹੋਵੈ ਸਾਹਿਬ ਸਿਉ ਮੇਲੁ ॥੩॥ ੧ ੧੨
My friends, please bless me that I achieve union with the Master (M: 1, SGGS, p 12)

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