Laavaan – The Sikh wedding Ceremony

Human birth is an opportunity for the soul to unite with the Creator. In the Sikh faith, the process of this union is taken as the model for conjugal union between the spouses. In spiritual union, the soul looks forward to finding the Almighty within. In this one needs and seeks the help of the guru’s teachings propagated in holy congregation. Listening to the virtues of the Master, the soul develops a yearning for the Almighty. When the Master is discovered within by way of awareness, a permanent connection with the Master is achieved with the soul receiving the celestial messages and recognizing them. This is life of Sahj or equipoise. On death of the body on the appointed day, the soul merges in the Supreme Soul – the Creator. This is equivalent to the bride leaving her parental home and joining the husband.

The Sikh wedding is performed by the couple circumambulating four times round the Sikh scripture called Sri Guru Granth Sahib, the revered Holy Book and the living Guru. With each round a stanza from the composition authored by the fourth Guru  called Laavaan – which literally means circumambulation for the wedding – is recited. In keeping with the contents of the stanzas, this signifies progressive spiritual closeness of the spouses to be, who become husband and wife at the end of the fourth round. The contents of the hymns are spiritual but are applied to the conjugal union with the soul or mind as the bride and the Almighty as the groom, to whose house the bride goes after the wedding. The teachings apply to both spouses so that the two bodies enshrine one spirit guided by the guru. In the composition the expression “bali raam jio” meaning I am sacrifice, i.e. I adore, the all pervasive Master who has made this possible, is repeatedly used. It signifies that the Master is the focus in the whole process. In the translation below it has been translated only in the first line.

First Laav

Har-i pahalarri laav parvirti karam drirraia bali raam jio.

The first thing in the wedding process is for the couple to (drirraia) accept firm commitment to (parvirti karam) family life, in the presence of the adorable revered Master.

Baani brahma ved dharma drirrhu paap tajaaia bali raam jio

Have firm faith in (baani) the guru’s word which teaches the duties the scriptures lay down, by following which (paap)transgressions in life are avoided.

Dharam drirrhu har-i naam dhiaavhu smriti naam drirraaia.

Be committed to (dharma) the duties, remember Naam, i.e. virtues and commands of the Almighty; the scriptures create this commitment to Naam.

Satigur gur poora aaraadhahu sabh kilvikh paap gavaaia.

Remember the Almighty and the teachings of the perfect guru; this causes all transgressions to be avoided.

Sahj anand hoaa vaddbhaagi man-i har-i har-i meetthaa laaia.

The fortunate person who does this (anand hoaa) enjoys bliss in (sahj) a state of poise and loves Naam – Divine virtues and commands, as guide for life.

Jan kahai Nanak laav pahli aarambh kaaj rachaaia. 1.

The first Laav – stage – is initiation of the process of the wedding, says the humble fourth Nanak. 1.

Second Laav

Har-i doojarri laav satigur purakh milaaia bali raam jio.

In the second Laav or stage the Almighty enables to find (satigur) the true guru.

Nirbhau bhai man hoe haumai mail gavaaia bali raam jio.

The guru creates respect for the commands of the Almighty one gives up the vice of ego and becomes (nirbhau) free of apprehensions of retribution as there are no transgressions.

Nirmal bhau paaia har-i gun gaaiaa har-i v-ekhai raam hadoor-e.

With respect for the impeccable Master, and emulating Divine virtues, one finds the all-pervasive Master ever present with the soul.

Har-i aatam raam pasaaria suaami sarab rahiaa bhrpoor-e.

The Master present within also pervades every where.

Antar-i baahar har-i prabh eko mil-i har jan mangal gaa-e.

In the company of the seekers – in holy congregation – one experiences the One Almighty within and outside, and sings (mangal) songs of joy as on a wedding.

Jan Nanak dooji laav chalaai anhad sabad vajaa-e. 2.

The second Laav – stage – is discovering the Master within and hearing continuous celestial music, says the humble fourth Nanak . 2.

Third Laav

Ha r-i teejarri laav man-i chaau bhaiaa bairaagia bal-i ram jio.

In the third Laav – stage – the mind develops (chaau) fondness and (bairaagia) yearns for the Master.

Sant janaa har-i m-el har-i paaia vaddbhaagia bali raam jio.

The Almighty is found in holy company/congregation and happens with good fortune determined by deeds.

Nirmal har-i paaia har-i gun gaaia mukh-i boli har-i baani.

The Impeccable Almighty is found, by reciting/remembering IT’s virtues and uttering the Master’s word – remembering Divine commands, as guide for life.

Sant janaa vaddbhaagi paaia har-i kathiai akath kahaani.

The fortunate seekers attain the Master and thus are able describe the indescribable, i.e. what was not understood so far.

Hirdai har-i har-i har-i dhun upji har-i japiai mastak bhaag jio.

With the Master in mind, the fortunate seekers have the celestial music playing in the mind.

Jan Nanak bolai teeji laavai upjai man-i bairaag jio.

The third Laav is the stage of when yearning for the Master develops, says the humble fourth Nanak. 3.

Fourth Laav

Har-i chutharri laav man-i sahj bhaia har-i paaia bali raam jio.

The fourth Laav – stage – is that of attaining the Almighty which creates a state of poise- there is no more wandering of the mind.

Gurmukhi milia subhaa-e har-i man-i tan- meetthaa laaia bali raam jio.

The Almighty is found with the pure love created by the guru’s teachings; the mind and body – the whole being loves IT.

Har-i meetthaa laaia mere prabh bhaaia andin har-i liv laai.

But this love comes at the deserved pleasure of the Master and then one ever remains focused on this love.

Man chindia phal paaia suaami har-i naam vaji vaadhaai.

The wished for fruit – the Master IT-self is attained and the mind (vaji vaadhaai = congratulated) feels joyous.

Har-i prabh tthaakur-i kaaj rachaaia dhan hirdai naam vigaasi.

The Almighty Master had initiated the wedding, i.e. union between the Almighty- husband and soul-wife takes place with Divine will; the soul-bride feels happy with Naam in mind – having discovered Divine virtues.

Jan Nanak bolai chauthi laavai har-i paaia prabh avinaasi. 4. 2.

The fourth and final Laav – stage – is of the soul attaining the eternal Almighty Master – the bride and groom are united and become wife and husband to ever live as two bodies but one spirit.

The process of Laavaan may be summed up by taking the first and last line of each Laav, thus:

1. Commitment to family life is the beginning of the process.
2. The soul-bride receives guidance from the true guru; thus being aware of Divine virtues it connects with the Almighty-spouse, in the mind
3. The soul-bride develops fondness and longing for union with the Spouse.
4. The soul-bride unites with the Almighty-spouse and obtains (sahj) tranquility; looks to no where else any more. Aq conjugal union takes place at the pleasure of the Almighty.